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Oh, the injuries of crossfit.

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We all have ’em.  Those moments when you realize that tender little bruise on your clavicle is because you banged it with a bar, or the callouses forming on your palms (badges of honor, I say) tear a little and bleed.

This morning I was killing it with some almost-heavy clean and jerks and whacked the sh*t out of my chin with the bar.  I also bit my tongue on both sides.  Classy.


Whole30 day 12 – some motivational progress, y’all!

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Whoa, really?  12 days?  Feels like 5. 

I was a little disappointed this morning when I decided to step on the scale.  Haven’t really lost a thing since last week when I weighed myself.  Luckily, I was smart enough to whip out my handy pink tape measure.  Yep, it’s pink.  I’m a girl. 

I’ve lost almost two inches in my tummy, and about an inch off each thigh.  Holla!  The only place I haven’t lost are my biceps.  Not complaining.  Hard to have tiny biceps when you’re a bad ass b*tch.

This was exactly the motivation I needed to keep going the next couple weeks.  The scale might not move, but obviously I’m making some remarkable progress.  Remind me to smash that scale later when I’m angry and need to destroy something.  

I’ve been killing it at crossfit, too.  I’m about to toot my own horn, so get ready.  I’ve been able to keep up (pretty easily) with all the WODs this week and last, and I have been using the RX weight.  That’s not typical for me.  Usually I see the RX weight and laugh, shake my head, and move along with my wimp-weights like it ain’t no thing.  This week I’m living sore and pretty stoked about it.  I can see these weird little muscles on my stomach poking out.  I think they might be abs, but I’ve never really seen them on my body before so it will take some additional time to research.  I’ll keep you posted.

Well, there you have it, folks.  Paleo works, crossfit is awesome, and seeing a little progress feels pretty damn good.  

Whole30 Day 3 and WOD recap

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Hey, guess what?  I’m on day four.  Here’s a recap of day 3:


Apple with almond butter

Salad with hardboiled egg and some fresh veggies, topped with avocado oil

Crockpot chicken with apples


I got the crockpot recipe out of a paleo magazine (can’t remember the name – sorry!).  It calls for chicken thighs but I used breasts and drumsticks with skin on, bones in. 

3 lbs skin on, bone in chicken

1 cup apple cider

½ cup apple cider vinegar

½ cup olive oil

3 diced garlic cloves

1 apple, cored, peeled, sliced

A few sprigs fresh thyme, chopped


Throw all that stuff in the crockpot on low for 6-8 hours.  Voila! 


It was pretty tasty, but I wish I had something else.  Not enough veggies (duh) so I threw a side of steamed broccoli on my plate, but it didn’t pair well.  Next time I hope to serve over mashed cauliflower or butternut squash, perhaps. 


Ok, I have a confession to make.  I weighed myself again.  I lost a little bit more (yay!).  To be honest, I was at a particularly heavy weight when I started that I don’t feel accurately reflects my average.  As promised (to anyhow who reads this nonsense), here are the starting measurements:


Weight:  136 lbs

R thigh – 23″
L thigh – 23″
Hips – 37″
Butt to pelvis – 39″
Waist at navel – 33″
Natural waist – 29.5″
R bicep – 11″
L bicep – 11″


I generally hover around 130 so 136 was pretty high for me.  I blame our trip to Chicago/Milwaukee where we ate the freaking butter burger.  Today I was at 132 (not bad for three days, huh?).  My last whole 30, I dipped to 124 and felt like I was just about right.  I have to keep in mind that I’m lifting a lot of weights these days, though.  And if I’m doing something right, I better have some more muscle to account for.  Please god, tell me I have some muscle in there. 


Made it to crossfit this morning with a few minutes to spare, so after I gloated around making sure all the coaches saw how punctual I was, I set to rowing.  I hate rowing.  In the beginning I had a little crush on rowing because running was the bane of my existence.  Funny how those things have swapped.  I would rather run 800 meters than row 400.  Sigh.


Row 800 meters


3x warmup:

10 PVC pass throughs

10 OH lunges (pvc)

10 second handstand

10 good mornings (love love those)


Technique practice:

1-1-1-1-1 heavy split jerk



1-3-5-7-7-5-3-1 split jerk at bodyweight (ha ha, as if I would be honest, or like I could even lift that)

100 meter sprint between each


Surprisingly, I did really well on this one.  My shoulder felt alarmingly well.  I managed to finish pretty quickly (13:16) but went with a safe weight (75#).  My sprints are ridic, though.  In a bad way.  Serious.  My sprints are slower than most people’s jog.  Embarrassing. One thing that I can always pride myself on is stellar form.  Don’t ask me where it came from, but my form is spot-on with every movement.  If only that translated into lifting heavy weights… 

Paleo Rants – Why I Love to Read Anti-Paleo Media Articles

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All my paleo pals will probably be nodding their heads as they read this post.  Have you come across articles that attempt to debunk the paleo diet?  Negative articles stating that the research is unfounded, evolution isn’t represented accurately, and if you follow a paleo diet your intelligence is probably similar to that of a caveman.  Sound familiar?

Sometimes when I’m bored, I Google some of those articles and skim through the content but spend hours scrolling through the comments.  I LOVE the support for the paleo lifestyle and gain some motivation each time I read them.  Sometimes I’m curious what compels people to write these articles; whether they’re researched well or not, it seems like it’s nobody’s business what ‘diet’ people subscribe to.  But, if that were true, then I wouldn’t be Googling this stuff all the time, eh?

What bothers me is the lack of suggestion they offer.  Quick to discredit a diet made of whole, real food centered on vegetables, fruits, and healthy meat.  But what, then, are they offering in terms of an alternative solution?  I love the retorts when whole grains are touted as healthy and essential… “tell that to my daughter that has Crohn’s disease.”  Bet that shut them up pretty quick.  How so many educated people can vilify a diet comprised of healthy foods in their most natural state just blows me away. 

The way I see it, paleo is not an attempt to eat exactly like a paleolithic person would by consuming wooly mammoth steaks cooked over a handmade fire.  (Do you think wooly mammoth tastes like chicken?) I think the primary takeaway is that you should eat things in their most natural state as that is how your body will best respond.  Shoving in pseudo food made of processed chemicals can’t possibly be a better solution than grass-fed beef and a side of organic broccoli.  To say that we have evolved (and are still evolving) to eat dairy and grain is not a theory that I can speak very intelligently about, but I have learned quite a bit through studying anthropology as a minor in college.  The way I understand it, evolution occurs when there is pressure on survival due to overwhelming circumstances of death without offspring.  This is the point that evolution occurs to adapt to what is available to sustain life.  For example, if we suddenly found ourselves without drinking water, there would be mass death.  It doesn’t necessitate extinction, per se, but instead suggests humans would adapt to require less fluid.  Because there have been no circumstances such as these in the past 10,000 years or so, there has been no need for humans to evolve.  Thus supporting Cordain’s and Voegtlin’s theories that human evolution has stalled and our genetic predisposition reflects that of humans in the paleolithic era.  Therefore, our bodies aren’t adapted to handle all of this agricultural, modified “food” that is hosted in grocery stores and most restaurants.

It’s difficult to interpret health studies and guides.  I think that most of us have come to the realization that the FDA doesn’t have our best interests at heart.  The food pyramid is a load of malarkey.  Even medicine, meant to heal the sick and cure what ails us, is heavily influenced by politics and money.  Instead of getting to the root of the ailment, we’re prescribed pills to assuage the symptoms and pretend we’re all better.  Unfortunately, mainstream science is not reliable or infallible and changes frequently, often in concurrence with social circumstances such as the production of corn, soy, etc.

Instead of subscribing to a fad diet, paleo folks just want to fuel their bodies with the most optimal food we can get our hands on.  Until I can find a better reason than this, I think the paleo foundation is the sanest and most logical explanation for healthful living I’ve come across.

Whole30 Day 2

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It’s officially day three, so I’m recapping day 2.  I skipped crossfit Tuesday morning because I looked at the WOD and it mentioned slam balls.  No thanks.  I don’t usually skip a workout based solely on whether or not slam balls are involved, but I’d say it’s a strong influence.  Usually I’ll muscle through it (or just fake it until the next movement comes up), but Tuesday consisted of rowing and slam balls.  I hate them both.  So, I stayed in my warm bed and felt guilty later on. 

Here’s what I ate:

2 coconut dates from Sprouts

Panang curry with chicken (added carrots, no rice)

Another 2 coconut dates from Sprouts

Leftover chicken again. 

I’ve noticed that it’s a lot easier to skimp on portions when Brian is out of town.  Usually he expects a large meal with plenty ‘o sides.  Granted, they’re healthy options like broccoli or Brussels sprouts, but there is usually a ton of food.  No wonder our grocery bills are astronomical.  When I’m alone, I usually eat standing at the kitchen counter and just grab what’s easy to throw together, with little concern for making an impressive meal to share.  With this revelation, I realize it may be the relationship that caused me to gain about 10 lbs in since we got together.  Although the food I put in my mouth is a lot healthier, the portion sizes are inflated.  Hmm. 

I think it’s important that I remember this every night as I’m loading up my plate.  I just registered for gigantic dishes, too.  Might need to rethink that move.

In terms of how I feel, I couldn’t be more pleased.  I have steady energy, stable mood, and I’m not hangry or wanting for any unhealthy food.  My skin is breaking out right now, so I’m not sure what that’s about.  I also took a little peek at the scale this morning (whoops) and I’ve lost a pound and a half since Sunday.  Not too shabby. 


Post-Whole30 help. Are there support groups for this?

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Allrighty all you paleo-ers, let’s have a discussion, k?  While I’m currently on a Whole30 (and kicking ass, I must say), I’m already beginning to contemplate days 31+.  My clear-cut weakness is the whole 80/20 concept.  If I allocate a few cheat meals, it inevitably ends up being a few cheat days, then a whole cheat week, and next thing ya know, I’m just binge eating like it’s freaking Thanksgiving up in here.  At the time it seems like a spoonful of ice cream here and a couple scoops of macaroni there won’t do much harm, but I know that sh*t adds up.  And I’m not even good at math!  Not only do I give myself a few non-paleo meals, but I also tell myself it’s ok when it’s a special occasion.  Do you know how many special occasions there are?!  Like a thousand.  My engagement parties.  So-and-so’s birthday party.  My friend is in town.  I’m out of town.  The dog ate our dinner so we have to order takeout.  The list goes on.  If you ever need an excuse for anything, just contact me because I have a limitless supply.

I know I need to create a more feasible plan post-Whole30 so I can stay on track with my paleo goals.  After all, I’m getting married in less than a year.  Oh, I didn’t mention that part?  Yeah, I’m engaged guys.  Getting married.  Need to look like a hot snack in my dress.  And who knows?  I may be wearing a bikini during my entire honeymoon.  Or naked.  But we don’t necessarily need to discuss that.

What do you do to cope with special occasion temptations?  When do you draw the line between a cheat meal so it doesn’t blur into a cheat day?

Rocktape for Rockstars

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I’ve been battling this nagging shoulder issue for several months now that is ruining any progress on certain oly lifts at crossfit.  I can’t snatch, I can’t overhead squat, I can’t kip swing, and I can’t push press.  My squats, cleans and dead lifts are coming along really well, and I love when I beat my 1RM.  If only my effing shoulder would get on board.  Such a selfish act.

It’s a blessing and a curse that my crossfit box posts the WODs online each night, so when I wake up at 5:30 I can prepare myself for what lies ahead.  Or I can wuss out and crawl back into bed.  Today, I crawled back into bead.  Wall balls and rowing?  Nothxbai.

I’m fortunate that my membership includes a couple sports/fitness therapists that can help work out the kinks when your body starts to ail you.  I have been seeing Georgia, the cutest little crossfitter that ever lived, for some active release technique (ART).  Eventually GA is going to be selling some ridiculously awesome crossfit clothes, so I’ll keep you guys posted.  For now she trains, coaches, and works on sweaty athletes with little injuries.  She has been taping me up after rubbing me down, all while giving me an opportunity to gossip and talk about myself (my favorite subject).  It’s a win-win.

I’ve spent the past few months taking it really easy on my little shoulder, keeping it taped, and asking for modifications during WODs so I don’t exacerbate things.  However, I’m afraid all my hard work is in vain if I don’t keep working out all areas of my body.  I’m tired of doing burpees in lieu of HSPUs and pull-ups.  Seriously, guys.  Burpees suck.  GA said I have something called a sub-scapular adhesion (wtf is that anyhow?) and the thing that helps the most is to dig my hand really deep into my armpit and hold it there.  Let me tell you, it feels great, but looks disgusting.  Fortunately I’m usually the only girl in my crossfit classes and the dudes don’t seem to care when I jam my fingers into my sweaty pits.  I’m so ladylike.

Rocktape is sexy!

Whole30 DAY 1!

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It’s official.  I’m going to Whole30 it up!  I meant to start on Saturday but was so hungover from Friday night that I could barely breathe, let alone grocery shop for healthy foods.  While I managed to choke down some paleo chili Saturday, I feel like it doesn’t quite count because I was still drunk from the night before.  So, Sunday was officially Day 1. 

I wasn’t quite hungry when I woke up and didn’t realize that I hadn’t eaten breakfast until it was past lunchtime.  So guess what I did?  Re-heated some paleo chili for the 2nd day in a row.  The problem is, that stuff is so good and I want to eat it every day.  I promise to post the recipe next time we make it.  Dinner was chicken breasts stuffed with heirloom tomatoes and assorted olives.  This is one of Brian’s favorite dinners.  We take chicken breasts and slice open a pocket in the side, then stuff diced tomatoes, onions or shallots, garlic, and olives.  Drizzle with olive oil and sprinkle with some salt.  Bake at 325 until no longer pink (I think this thing takes about an hour, man.  Way too long when you’re really hungry).  We paired the chicken with fresh green beans cooked in coconut oil. 

Because I was still nursing my hangover (that’s right, 2 days – I’m not a kid anymore, dammit), I didn’t make it to the store again.  We have some broccoli and leftover chicken, salad, and some frozen fruit, so I think I can last a few days.  I’m still using to track my nutrition, focusing more on carbs than calories. 

I’m not quite ready to post photos online.  I’m not sure if/when that moment comes for people who blog about weight loss.  Will I ever feel comfortable posting my body in a bikini on the interwebs?  Terrifying.  I’ll post my weight and measurements this week (if I can stomach it). 


Almost Whole30 time!

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Welp, it’s another week.  After traveling to Chicago and Milwaukee over the weekend, I ate and drank a lot more than I should (which isn’t uncommon for me, so maybe I should quit that).  We had our engagement party with a bunch of old folks, which wasn’t terrible.  You hardly have to make conversation with them because you repeat every sentence two or three times.  I’m also pretty certain that half the guests were near blind and had no idea that I was the bride.  Easy peasy.

Did you know that there is such a thing in Wisconsin as a “butter burger”?!  What is a butter burger, you ask?  Well, just another American beauty consisting of a hamburger with a GIGANTIC scoop of butter on the patty.  I’m not kidding.  Hey America, this is why we’re fat!

I am pretty sure that’s about 6 tablespoons of butter per burger. Hey man, you want some bun with your butter?

 In spirit of the Whole30 I’ll be starting Saturday, I thought I should work really hard this week to limit my non-paleo meals and get in the habit of tracking my food (as well as boring you all with the daily journal).  I’m going to attempt to mimic The Primal Blueprint recommendations on carb control, thus the importance of tracking my food.  I’m using because I’m familiar with it, it’s free (and I’m cheap), and it shows fat, carbs, calories, etc.  Some of the apps I tried on my phone don’t show carbs so it’s worthless to me.  If you have any better suggestions, I’m all ears.  The Primal Blueprint suggests 50-100g carbs a day to prompt weight loss (maintenance is 100-150g, 150g+ is the danger zone, and under 50 will put you in ketosis).  More info can be found on Mark’s blog


Here goes nothin’!

Breakfast –

  • Two medjool coconut dates from Sprouts market (holy carbs, batman – going to rethink this one tomorrow)
  • Leftover paleo sweet potato chili

 Lunch –

  • Humongo salad of mixed greens
  • Chopped red bell pepper
  • Chopped red onion
  • Grape heirloom tomatoes
  • Avocado oil and balsamic vinegar

Dinner –

Steak and veggies.  Look how pretty! 



I wasn’t hungry for lunch until almost 3pm, so I think the past couple days of regulating my sugar intake have already started working.  My energy level is steady. 



  • 15 minutes to find heavy sumo deadlift
  • 1000 meter row (we opted to run since the sunrise was so killer)
  • 80 air squats
  • 70 double unders
  • 60 mountain climbers
  • 50 push press (55 lbs for women)
  • 40 sumo deadlift high pull
  • 20 burpees
  • 25 min cutoff


I made it through 14 burpees before the time cutoff.  I spent a good amount of time on the double unders because that sh*t is hard, no matter who you are.  However, I can string a handful together now, so I’m improving.  Baby steps, guys.   

I don’t always write well, and I’m okay with it.

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Let me paint you a story.  I work in a creative agency with a handful of really talented copywriters.  Seriously man, these people are no joke.  Sometimes I sit with my mouth drooping open when they talk, because how come they are so smart and why are they better at this than me?  Guess that’s the reason they are copywriters and I’m not.  Whew, I dodged that bullet.  My responsibility is to watch over these creative minds (like a shepherd watching a flock of gentle sheep, I like to imagine), and make sure no of them get stuck in bushes or write some complete gibberish that is presented to an important client.  I’m thinking about hiring a border collie to nip their ankles when they start to stray.

Occasionally I’m asked to guest post on our company blog or create some content for an email campaign.  This content is, thankfully, copy edited by the aforementioned geniuses.  What happens next is I get a “quick review” of my content, complete with major strikethroughs, completely reworded sentences (or paragraphs, usually), and a few comments like “what does this even mean?”.  I sit there looking at the computer monitor thinking, wow, was it that terrible?  Meh, probably.  And if this is just the quick review, then what would it look like if they had given it a thorough comb?  Would they just trash the whole thing and start over?  Meh, probably.

After a handful of rejections, you start to realize this just ain’t your thing.  No biggie.  I’m okay with it.  Guess what I can do?  Handstand motherflippin’ pushups, yo!  I don’t have to be great at everything.  However, this hasn’t prevented me from posting entries on this blog.  Because, guess what?  I can do what I want.  May not be worth reading, but that’s okay, nobody is paying me to do a good job.  And if I worry too much about the content of my postings, I’ll start to drain all the fun out of blogging.  My sole purpose here is to maintain a side project outside of work that will allow me to learn something new without feeling obligated.